not finished but still read
 

U ran ur mouth in the wrong fuckin place
And now theres about 5 holes in ure face
U’ve been busted with a cap and ur now legally dead
Everyone stands around as a shitload of crap boils out of your head
U said the wrong word at the wrong place at the wrong time
And someone heard and told the owners of the palace and they crossed the line
And they lost their temper and began to lose control
and the cost u got was getting riped a new asshole
and ur heart ripped out and put in a bowl and fed to a cannable
his name was simple, it was just plane ol, michole
and as u were serveed he let go a drool
cuz they told him u were ribs, what a damn fool

some lines good some are aight,try tho to make all yo lines the same length it has a better flow like that but i liked it.jus needs work.hollla


CTF(represent)

that was an aight peice. i think u could improve a little more on the vocab and wordplay, but overall all that was ok. keep postin dude cause ull keep elevatin

yo can u check out my post, its called 'back in hell', thanx

peace.....

you could definatley improve this piece...

i mighself don't listen/read to the 'gun anthem' type... but thats just me, your lines didn't match, your flow was newbish and it fell off a couple of times, rhymescheme was herbish, and your topic was kinda... ehh... well lets just leave that part out... work on it man, keep spittin.

It was a alright drop, you should try to match your lines up though it helps flow better, you could use some more wordplay and more vocab, but it was alright, keep dropping, and if you could check out me and Gene Pools peice called 2 of a kind, thanks.

YOU GOT SOME SKILLL NOW BUILD