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-   -   tha new KIM... (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=83094)

Provoked Images 10-02-03 11:51 AM

tha new KIM...
 
entitled JESSIE...

Do NOT fuckin test me...
do NOT try to FUCKIN use ur words to arrest me...
JESSIE, u FUCKIN BITCH! u cannot best me...
fuck u while ur eyes undress me, tha lesson be...
NOT TO FUCKIN MESS WIT ME...BITCH!!!

so u had to say u loved me/
but afta u fucked me/
u no longer hugged me/
but u were huggin me when u sucked me/
now wat tha fuck is up wit tha love B?/
Did u forget all about me?/
do u no longer want to hang out B?/
life without me is not a life at all/
and i know u don't want to live it cause u gave it ur all/
but now u dropped tha ball/
don't stall it all/
all cause u wanted to be free/
it's not that easy, that's forcheezy/
when ur surrounded by testies/
that infest u while each of these ovaries infest me/
words cannot arrest me/
i'll tell u again, they cannot arrest me/
my mind's turbines will constantly combine/
a line wit a line/
call it a rhyme and this time/
tha rhyme is aimed directly at u BITCH/
now wat u gonna do BITCH?/
u could act like u got a disease like tha flu BITCH/
but i'm still comin afta u BITCH!/

U FUCKIN DID ME WRONG BITCH, U WILL FUCKIN PAY...
UR A FUCKIN NOBODY TO ME!...
PAYBACK'S A FUCKIN BITCH, AIN'T IT?
IT'S A FUCKIN BITCH, AIN'T IT?
(choke choke)
IT IS AIN'T IT?

now ur gonna get sliced and diced, just die/
sliced and diced, don't try to come back, just fry/
in hell when u fell, wat did i tell ya?/
messin wit an angel is dangerous, now i'll kill ya/
--x2--

(this is only verse one...but hit me up wit some feedback anyway)

tRiPliCiTy 10-02-03 12:59 PM

wtf? was this, u rhymed all like 20 times in a row
B B B B B B wtf?
arest me arest me?
is your keyboard set on stutt-stutt-stutter
flow was off, please work on that,
your bar structure was like everywhere
need to even up your lines more
umm really wasnt feeling this, i mean come on
u were too repetative and ur style was like bah!!!!
just elivate in every aspect, and next time dont repeat your rhyming word.........................
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=82918

Kosta 10-02-03 01:03 PM

that was really whack.
if your gonna write about
girls gone bad, at least
kill her.

Mr.Christensen 10-02-03 01:08 PM

umm yea...
i see what you were trying to do with it, seem more like you were talking than rapping but it didnt work that well

stay away from same word rhymes, makes you look simple

i know you can do better than this

if you would be so kind
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...?threadid=83050

N.D.eva 10-02-03 04:25 PM

i agree this shit was far from ill, thinx ya been takin too much medicine Ha Ha...............
i couldn't pick out a strong point it was all weak especially ya structure, think ya should work on it before spittin again. or change ya style.................. aight

Provoked Images 10-03-03 10:19 PM

this was a new style of mine, so don't try to start bein hard or some shit and i c that u didn't like this style so i'll stick wit tha old one, oh an by tha way, it sounds perfect when i rap it, this isn't a text rap to tell tha truth...

xxInfinityxx 10-03-03 11:02 PM

ooooooooooooookay

1: u are not Eminem

2: this shit was wack man, (no hatin) but u jes sound like a psycotic who wants to be Eminem................

ur shit was too basic.........

Provoked Images 10-04-03 10:09 AM

did u even bother to read tha shit i stated RIGHT BEFORE YOUR POST???


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