Nothing [part II] depressing sadness
 

Like wow i'm on this topic again why........................
yea i wrote this when i was kinda real sad...............

I'm still searching for the meaning, that very same reason,
Thats mistreating, my inner self that deep thought being,
i'm seeing the eteranl darkness on the sunshine rainbow,
i'm facing the mental anguish by ambushing one time angels,
take a sample of thier halo, just too see how my day goes,
am i a changed man with a derranged plan? or
am i that strange man with a restrained plan.........
and what ever the weater condition, cloud nine keeps bitching,
complaning about the blood muscle pump's paining,
chanel it out.... flip through differnt stages and stereotypes
pannel it out... grip through different ages and material likes
handle it out... rip a few different cases of serial fights
dismantle it out... trip a few different faces of imperial nights.

I keep stressing for my lack of self anti depressants
the sky keeps testing so i try harder to be impressive
this world's been pessimistic why do i have to press this message
across the gobal network system while i'm domestic,
what am i protesting? aknowledgement?! or appreciation
for accomplishments? or less hating for nonsense sense [yes it makes sense]
i'll be that cat without a licsense, drink driving into a wall of
corrupted moral judgement wreckless, hanging on the a false
unconstructed critisim with an identity of a deathwish,
i'm taskeen that cat who's tried of just everything.......[what do u mean everything]
I havent seen it all and i wont see the rest, i'm the handicapped
juggler with fire outta my chest, i'm that multi strapped smuggler
with desires of being the best but i'll retire being this mess.....

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...2724#post822724
and some newbies who were dropping off gankstah keystyles

This seems more like a story to me ^^

i couldnt find a real rhyme scheme, ...but u had ok vocab^

Was ok read :)

Hit up Gods Journal^^preciated

nice and long reply....................................

i'll return the favor with 29 words jsut like u

U hate to much ^^it was a nice drop but
I didnt have more to say on this piece than that :)

i dont hate alrite, i just tell it like it is

So im i, ...im bad at breakin down open mic's i dont really feel :)..but still this was nice. sorry for the not to construtive break down ^

read shiznit's replies.....................................if u really wanna learn how to drop LONGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGg replies

i found tha rhyme scheme,well expressed emotions here,vocab was good in some places,descent in ohers,wordplay wasn't there in abundance but was present and was descent,if it's suppose to be a song do a hook,if it was jus a spit it was good as it had me feelin what u were talkin bout and wondering,so good work,did what was desired.

Peice

yea its sorta uncomplete, i just aint feeling like writing about that topic lately, just gotta wait till i get that feelin inside again, i gotta write the 3rd verse and hook

thnx for the reply

Uping