new keystyle
 

new keystyle check it:


With this deep shit and urban decay
I wish I could sprout wings, and fly away
to a brighter day, cos seein violence has got me crazed
to the point we dish out beatins and we aint even phased
Days of the poor and dangerous, life is hard
steppin out ya door leaves ya perminantly or mentally scared
so I need top chill, take some prozac or some shit
to cheer me up, cos I feel under the weather and shit





not that long but hit it up

very basic it is a start but not the best one you need work alot of it but you got potential to be real good keep posting pop and pee my omens peace

the structure needs help, try to get a similar syllabul count in each line
the vocab was not that bad...flow was kinda off
drop longer pieces next time

ok, flow could use some work, vocab was ok, overall it was really pretty basic....try dropping something a lil longer next time...keep dropping though, you'll get better the more you write...

yo it was aight....short but ok for yo first...yo you could av improved on yo vocab an multies, internals....
keep droppin...
peace........