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-   -   ""The Homeless"" (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=84099)

GeT CrUnK 451 10-07-03 08:34 PM

""The Homeless""
 
How would u feel livin on the street//
Being like a slave only guidin a beat/bein robbed/and mobbed//
eatin each and every day like a slob/can by no food cause u aint got no job//
Only thing u got is this blanket and cup for money//
cant even go in the store to afford to by some honey//
livin each and every night sleepin unda the stars//
hearing sudden vrooms by fast passing cars//
honks and horns and people talkin//
dirty and sweaty and only got 2 feet for walking//
get behind bars for stealin cars//
come out left with non treatin/beatin scars//


ayo peep this

HazY.B 10-07-03 08:48 PM

im just waiting for content to come in here and say
damn you post some replies first

then of course after you do
i will come back and give you some critique on your poem

Ajax 0042 10-07-03 09:11 PM

agree with ^^^....

Da NFamous 10-07-03 10:29 PM

^freeposter ^^waste of time
i thought the piece started off on the brink of mediocrity and i wa a little irritated to see another rapper try poetry and not be able to fulfill the varying levels of depth but this piece surprised me becasue u came thru with some strong rhymes in the second half and some good messages that need to be heard, though the "honey" line was corney the ending was very good and i liked it overall, 1luv.

ModestlyShi 10-07-03 10:57 PM

^lmao^...sorry fa the free post but i aint got shit to say on this "poem"


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