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-   -   9 To 5 Victom (please Read) (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=84778)

WORD~PERFECT 10-11-03 01:42 AM

9 To 5 Victom (please Read)
 
I KNOW THE FLOW MAY SEAM OFF BUT THIS IS SPIT WITH MANY BREAKS AND ADLIBS ONE I ADD THEM IN IT GOES PERFECT WITH BEAT I PLAN ON DROPPING IT TO.



The government set the trap.
I learned this when I shut my yap-
Then Looked at how parallel lines box us inside on a map.
IM FROM WHERE WE SPEAK SLANG AND DROP RIDDLES.
Fake thugs catch slugs and couldn’t CRIP walk if they were cripple.
I was blind until i realized-the earths longical and lateral lines-
Were prison bars keeping me confined- to my city signs.
Prison was probation-outside was.rehabilitation…
Living was a transfer to solitary confinment-
I steered away from my destined paths assignment-
And was lost once I discovered my car needed an alignment.
I once was a 9 to 5 labor cybernetic organism-
With slave genetics,brain prostetica and no grasp for realism.
Happiness was a vision-perfection in depiction.
I ‘ll picture it… paint it to my mind… but the illustration is fiction.
All I need is my 3 peace plus a suitcase.
and the drive to waiste-20 to 30 years that move with haiste.

HOOK: it’s the 9 to 5-you have to survive-So from 5 to 9 you can feel alive.
If you think a job means your part of society then your phony.. homie-
Life is a bitch that divorced you now she collecting allamony.

……………………sit back then comprehend -I cant pretend………………
if I retire at 60 I can enjoy life 10 minutes before it ends.
So then i lived to live till i’ve lived now there’s preperation-
to live till I die with no justification.
It seams i feared death but worked to it …feed my infatuation-.
On my tombstone it just reads “sorry im not in,” ive taken a permanent vacation.
I worked like a slave but my appetite was never pleaseant.
while the king ate like one off the labor from his peasants.
My Christmas gift was to live for the present-
May I present you life that will be spent trying to afford rent.
So now I pay to live….is this really my fate?
If so fuck church I work for the IRS to pass the collection plate.
You ever noticed that handcuffs look like rough shackles?
But they placed on your wrist.
so you don’t remember they were once on your ankles-Racism exsists.
It went from suicidal. to a split version pyramid adding homocidal and genocidal-
To judis now holding a bible telling you worship false idols-
I GOT A HEADACHE …but this aint fake-
im overdosing on MIDOL-and seeing the world half baked.

HOOK: it’s the 9 to 5-you have to survive-So from 5 to 9 you can feel alive.
If you think a job means your part of society then your phony.. homie-
Life is a bitch that divorced you now she collecting allamony.


except my application. I don’t need a resemay-
Just to except im a slave- and your making better pay.
Every 2 weeks get paid For the work I do every day-
But I wont be promoted unless I become an official brownnoser and obey.
I get fired if I delay-but each time is just the same thing relayed-
I wish I could tape 8 hrs of laborportrayed- rewind it and press play-
Act as your boss then pawn my assets the minimum wage way.
The fire you and say-“sorry we’re downsizing now please go away.”
I work my fingers to the bone, with marks that prove how I abused it-
I need a job for medical benefits, but my work is why I use it.
I been fed shit till there is no room for dijestment-
Land of the free for a fee
I gave my rib for a woman but live alone with my bad investment.
Do you See the idiocrisy in me?
I try to invent-ways to be content-
But each minute pass matrix style in animated suspence.
NO FALSE PRETENCE-but taxes tax those that lack no man exzempt.
The price of life written to the check its in~tence-
the aspects of the cost of your soul nothing but an ex~spence.


HOOK: it’s the 9 to 5-you have to survive-So from 5 to 9 you can feel alive.
If you think a job means your part of society then your phony.. homie-
Life is a bitch that divorced you now she collecting allamony.

KnightShade 10-11-03 02:17 AM

pretty good, flow on and off, alright vocab and shit, good stuff man keep it up.

keep elevating.

WORD~PERFECT 10-11-03 03:08 AM

THNKS WHAT COULD FIX THIS RIGHT THOUGH AS FAR AS VOCAB

gotaloveforrap 10-11-03 03:42 AM

wow that was pretty damn interesting, i was surprised to see the flow fall off a little, but whatever, ur vocab was pretty good to normal standards, but ur above normal, so for u i thought it was lackin some vocab, but other than that i was feelin it, good drop.

yo, can u please hit up my first battle wit an honest vote?
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=84781
itd be much appreciated.

peace.......

~RuThLEss~ 10-11-03 04:17 AM

Word Nothin but Love fo yo Master Pieces as ussual

SIck Shit

Otherwordz 10-11-03 04:27 AM

yo...if this shit sucks worse than me then it must be pretty damn good...;)...I'd put that on the poll if I could poll vote...

WORD~PERFECT 10-11-03 04:52 AM

yo thieves battle me for fun

Otherwordz 10-11-03 05:18 AM

^^^ok...is it gonna have a poll...cause I don't wanna be responsible for makin' my fam 0-6...;)

WORD~PERFECT 10-11-03 05:55 AM

shit thievs dont get STOLE on

BLeeCH 10-11-03 10:41 AM

i was feeling this, shit was tight... liked your views...

WORD~PERFECT 10-11-03 11:52 AM

thk you i thought it may of been to far out my rhyme parimiter

Dirty Sally 10-11-03 01:04 PM

That was good. Good wordplay, vocab and the hook was catchy. The flow is on point, my only suggestion would be to switch the 2nd and 3rd verses, it would flow better that way. Other than that I think it would make a good audio. Stay active fam. One+ :)

WORD~PERFECT 10-12-03 02:21 AM

UPPIN AND THNKS MAMI

compatible 10-12-03 02:56 AM

tight shit, i liked the last line in the hook, that alimony shit was dope. i've gotta start writing longer shit. by the way. what the fuck are multies? does it got to do with syllables, words per bar? and, just a suggestion, is longical a word? i thought it was latitude and longitude. anyway, nice drop

yog_dogg 10-12-03 04:48 AM

yeah word~P that was some nice shit dawg,,, i enjoyed readin this shit but the flow fell off a little but the vocab was good overall i enjoyed it keep writin dawg


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