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-   -   Faith (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=84903)

rule 10-11-03 06:38 PM

Faith
 
Desperate for a verbal tone or a slight complement
Of hope from you an I to greet achievements
Caught in an internal storm im crying tears of rain
You have eyes yet your blind to see my life of pain
That was once happiness but then flipped situations
Having a son raising a man was an important obligation
You didnt wonna do it, you ran out on your frustrations
Didnt have time to listen, for me you had low payshince
Occupied by the torture of peers and you as my concence
Thoroughly dreaming of me saying hi and your responces
No beliefs that your son is brilliant on a soccer feild
Talent im held bak from i always stop have ta yeild
Allow others to practice my profession into perfection
Declining my dream,love, the only thing i have a pation
Through blood sweat an tears, im declaring myself
A lost child, who harms himself cuz of the loves stealth
To never be seen, a ghost a phantom hiddin away
C'mon dad, have a little faith in ya son someday
Praying that im not naturally a lost birth na'mean
A kid put on the earth whos best friend is a dream
Cant complain, i guess i always get what i desire
Exsept a father wit faith in his young empire
Climbing an struggling yet to be noticed by few
The hills to steap no promises i'll pull through
Dad, take recignition of your sons position
Im'a grave yard, wit dreams burried is a tradition
Termendous amount of torture but i ask of you this
That one day you may promise i will be a son whos missed
A little misguided but i took what was on my dirty plate
All i ask for you dad is you watch over me bring me faith

GeT CrUnK 451 10-11-03 11:24 PM

that was a really good i really like it good vocab i feel like that sometimes like my dad doesnt pay attention to me some times mann im waiting for you to post some more of your stuff man
that was good

filed 10-12-03 06:40 PM

iight

this here i liked alot, for the fact that it was so well drawn, and ever thou i dont live throu the same pain, i could feel it i could taste it and hate it for what it was talking about, for all the pain and fustration it causes ppl in this world, not really beliving that ppl can overlook their children like that. i think you did a great job in venting in this piece, and STILL keeping good structure, vocab abd flow going. nice

~Tera~
DONT HATE

rule 10-13-03 10:15 AM

thanks...uppen for some more feed

rule 10-14-03 08:50 AM

UPPEN

evilbombsquad 10-15-03 11:49 PM

Dang this was a heartfelt journey ya expressed here. ya emotions were think threw the entire peice. good stuff stay up wit it

Quoteable:
Through blood sweat an tears, im declaring myself
A lost child, who harms himself cuz of the loves stealth
To never be seen, a ghost a phantom hiddin away
C'mon dad, have a little faith in ya son someday


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