first ryhme
 

u can take this next line as an opposing pun//
yo,fuck u and neo i'm the chosen one//
fuckin with me kid u gotta b dumb//
i'll reach for my pocket you'll try and run//
i'll pull it out and clock it then you'll know its my gun//
3 shots in the head so don't fuck with me son//
cause i'll take your life//
make a widow out ya wife//
and cause your whole mother fuckin family strife//
all of the above can b done with a knife//
like a hot one i melt it like butter//
come against me and i'll leave you in the gutter//
cause people say that im a nutter//
i go on like tiger woods and i'll clap u with my putter//
i sting like a bee and i float like a butter//
i'll b comin at u with an uppercutter//
i may not b the greatest but i'll try and do my thing//
i'll be on the mic like ali was in the ring.


yo this is my first try at this so giv me some feedback cheerz

ps. criticism is good!!!

ok, your flow needs some work...try and make your lines somewhere around the same length so it'll flow better...maybe try and add some multies to help with the flow also...vocab was pretty simple and could use some uppin...content was ok but nothing special...try and make your pieces a lil more interesting to read...overall not bad though...keep dropping, the more you drop the better you'll get...so just keep dropping son...

And It will Be your Last

some of your lines you spit was tight, your style is grimmy, and i like that, so keep postin and i'll read, fuck the vetrans on this site, in my book of lyrics you aight.................one





the reaper bronx with heat seekers