the truth i cant live with.
 

As she held me I could hear the beat of her heart-
She could only see the future and the tattoos of her track marks.
I was 13 paralyzed on the floor crying for help-
As my kidney swelt-I cant discribe or scribe how it felt.
In the emergency room-feeling like death was coming soon-
But no such luck now im 22 and the pain still lumes.
I recall heavens first call-I saw myself fall-
In third person-but it wasn’t my time it was just rehearsen.
I was cursed-but I had done nothing wrong-
Lived each day as a year I wasn’t expected to last long.
Sleepless nights-
the cancer was the answer the pain and holding my sheets tight.
Day was the birth of life so I cried to sleep every night.
Uncontrollable spasms tears shed for what Im missing-
Loosing control of myself cant even tell when im pissing.
Seeing all my friends grow up most of them found a wife-
But I couldn’t have that im engaged to cheating life.
Hearing myself pray every night hoping to blessed-
That’s if its my last time may I finally find peace in my rest.
Realizing the beauty of a sunset…the waves of the ocean-
Stirring internal infernal emotions.
Cause I burn them into my mind- so when I die I leave nothing behind.
But as everything move forward it seams I living in rewind.
So alone-in sarrow I barrow love and find my home-
No matter what happens nobody will ever be me-
No one will ever see me.the way I see myself-
Nobody will endure my journey into hell.
Suicide attempts but sadly to no avail-
Im locked up in this body and cant afford bail.
My mother passed of the same disease-
I was almost 23-as she died with such ease.
She was a strong spirit who faught her guilt so hard to believe-
She could pass the memory I breathe in a breeze.
Now everything seams to be sloped-its been 22 yrs and I still cant cope-
So you tell me is there is room for love when there’s none for hope?
Now that I confessed how its been an my history-
I wonder if there is a place for me in purgatory.
The pains to strong god forgive me but after so long I turn coward-
The doctors gave me another 365 to live but i been dead for more than 365 hrs.

UPPIN

ya structure is improving...and the story is nice like rice...almost brought a tear to my eye...lol...not really...but dope drop...just add some damn multi'z damn it...and get aim express...;)

pop this is a true story i was diagnosed with cancer in my kidneys a bacteria the resulted from my mother herion addiction

you depressed in this piece dude................good piece...pain comes across well.............................................. ..............check ourt battle WORD~PERFECT, no ones votin.............its pissin me off, 2 votes been cast thats it...........

ayo damn nice emotional piece here.....good struture and you went with the scheme and all really good and never side tracked....nice wordplay and vocab...shit was niceness all around


hit up WE TIRED with me and masta c please

and this battle
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=86873

thanks

nice peice dawg.. i know this came from ur heart as i read it.. i almost felt like i was in ur place.. though i cant say that i suppose.. but u helped out the peice with the very clear imagery and vocab and the flow was just so real...
------------============================--------------------
Suicide attempts but sadly to no avail-
Im locked up in this body and cant afford bail.
------------============================--------------------
damn dude.. i felt this one deep.. reminds me of someone i know all too well.. deep. hope to see more, 1love.

Personal shit is always my favorite to read 'cause it actually has meaning to the person who wrote it... this was nice... I was able to walk in your shoes through reading your lyrics... good wordplay and imagery... keep on spittin'....

Nice piece fam. You put alot of heart into and that's what makes it nice. Stay active fam. Love is Love. One+

THANK YOU AND THAT MEANT ALOT I PUT MYSELF OUT THERE TO BE REDICULED BY THIS PIECE BUT THE RESPONCE LETS ME SEE A LIGHT IN A FEW PEOPLE I THOUGHT WHERE COMPLETELY EMOTIONLESS

lmao... we all got love for ya dawg...
heres your feed,

Emo- all around... perfect... i dont think its possible to put any more emo into this shit...
flow- good, could have been improved by structure, but you gettin
there...
vocab- nice... better than you usually do on this category...

I think this is the best peice that I've seen you drop...
you reppin da Omens well dawgy...
oh yeah, our collab is gettin mad slept on... lmao
told ya it would if I posted it... haha
~Ashy~

Damn! I just posted on yer collab an now im seein why yu on some dark shit. Its a shame to think that your talent and focus might be comin out of despair,but you gotta see the light cause when you drop some tight shit like that people will be thinkin an you know you doin some good.....
Quite a tightly worded piece, and comes across very pro. Nice form.

Stay up dog, Peace

really dope piece dawg...
nice structure,flow and vocab, I liked it,you're ill!