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-   -   A Soldiers Return . . . (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=88251)

.existance. 10-28-03 09:23 AM

A Soldiers Return . . .
 
A Cool Breeze Is Blowing Trees Leaves With Ease.
You Can Hear It; The Spirits Of Those Deceased.
Please The Eyes With A Sunset Of Creative Colors.
There Are Seven Wonders;
But Its Heaven's Brothers That Are Protecting Others.
The Night Becomes Cold, Memories Are Growing Old.
Officers Of Law And Heroes Of War Got No Respect.
Protesting Conflicts ? ?
They Were Just Doing Their Job With No Regrets.
They Thought It To Be Best;
It Reflects The Moon In June Like The Crystal Lake.
Murdering Youth;
This Is Proof Enough To Stop Shootings With Pistol Brakes.
Lisps On Stakes, Tongues Clamped;
So There Is No Lip Mistakes.
Now Its Christmas Day, The Stars Die Out For Those Who Pray.
Dreams Were Shattered, But The Nightmares Will Stay.
The Memories.
Fighting Bravely, Lighting Graves Are All They See.
Still Blood Pumping;
But The Veteran Heart Is Empty.
The Gray Clouds Are Covering The Day.
But Nobody Will Be Recovering Today, Life Is Poor.
No Children Killers, Its Hard To Ignore.
Just Written Pillars, And The Wife Is Sure.
Spit On And Snubbed, These Role Models Have No Love.
Time Is Simple, Life Changes And Deranges The Purest Of Doves.

Lemme Get Some Replies, This Is For Yall Who Didnt Like My Lovey Dovey Poetry . . . ~1

Xcentrik 10-28-03 09:39 PM

whoa, I like how there was no structure... Seriously, i Do
the rhymes were clever and positioned well

incredible... keep that shit up man

.existance. 10-28-03 09:42 PM

There Was Structure When I Wrote It, But I Changed It So It Put Emphasis On The Parts I Wanted It To . . .

.existance. 10-29-03 10:40 PM

Uppin . . . Yall Bitch About Love Poetry And Then Yall Dont Reply To This ? ? 1

Undeniable 10-30-03 09:55 AM

Very nice. It flows good and the word choice and the meaning is top. Excellent

.existance. 10-30-03 04:02 PM

Thanx For The Reply, Uppin For More . . .

varentao 10-30-03 09:08 PM

Powerful. Told like a worn and torn sage of sorts. Just letting rip with observations on the world. After years of weathering harsh reality. Which in a way has become the norm.

You remained on the edge through out the piece. The bitterness showed through too. In a very evokative way. Nice.

..resp...

.:LadySage:. 10-30-03 10:10 PM

Powerful... I must agree with varentao
Deep, i cant even start to explain this, and that happens hardly..never
nice piece, i enjoyed reading it
you showed reality from a different view
brought light to the actual impure world
... i like it
keep elevatin

.existance. 10-31-03 02:42 PM

Im On Point With My Shit :)


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