Change(Feat: Deva and COM)
 

Posted in these peoples---Token, KFC, JimmyRipper

Masta C:
My life has changed, theres just to many new-things…
Views arent the same, “Corrupted Visions” is what you-bring…
I have no trust, and no luck, just drifting away as my eyes go-shut..
Tears go down my face, pain is erased, cause I made slow-cuts…
Torment comes-back, as my eyes just run-black, like a bad movie…
Inside I cry, wishing that I would die, and wanting someone to soothe-me..
Life surrounded by broken-trust, I guess life is just joken-us…
While everyone wants me to tell them whats wrong and open-up...
Emotions now just cant be controlled, so much chaos like-a-war…
In the end I think im just fooled, it makes me not want to fight-no-more..

COM:
My life is rearanged... its strange changing lanes
I'm deranged going insane... coz dopes fried my brain
Its plain to see... my life will be... after me until I change
wanna break the chains of pain... so I can leave the bills in flames
The wind of change blows... through open windows
So if you leave ya guard open... thats when ya shin goes
Sins glow until you're gone... and showing off fails
Feels like you're always on track... but you're going off the rails
Blame everyone else... its like what you're trained to do
And the only thing thats really changed..... was you

Deva:
Changes are about growing wiser, from acoustic to an amplifier
Leave education, enter the main frame, start burning the fire
-Desire is the want, leading change, which is taking you higher
To new places, new faces, expanding, broadening mental attire
-Wont be branded a liar, for exceeding my expected limit
Its imminent, im livin it, gone past change, cos im diligent (hard-working)
Another word for evolution - moving present to the distant
Transformation could be used, but the real word aint listed
The basis of life, without it we would be scorned and twisted
Its good to move on from bad times, the crimes a wont miss it……….

What the hell is this shit..I was supposed to be a member of Corrupted Visions! Anyway..all good shit..work on your rhymes and beats..nothing that a little practicing won't hurt. other than that your awesome! Keep up the good work homies!!

Masta C:
My life has changed, theres just to many new-things…
Views arent the same, “Corrupted Visions” is what you-bring…
I have no trust, and no luck, just drifting away as my eyes go-shut..
Tears go down my face, pain is erased, cause I made slow-cuts…
Torment comes-back, as my eyes just run-black, like a bad movie…
Inside I cry, wishing that I would die, and wanting someone to soothe-me..
Life surrounded by broken-trust, I guess life is just joken-us…
While everyone wants me to tell them whats wrong and open-up...
Emotions now just cant be controlled, so much chaos like-a-war…
In the end I think im just fooled, it makes me not want to fight-no-more..
^

this guy

hmmm....
yikes the flow was coo, i read it easily at least, nice rhymes dawg...sounds like you need a friend, hmmm and uhh bad things....hmmm, fuck, elevate by reading poetry! :confused: so u could uhm....define yer emotions better and paint that sad picture u tried to paint....it was nice tho...keep workin piccaso


COM:
My life is rearanged... its strange changing lanes
I'm deranged going insane... coz dopes fried my brain
Its plain to see... my life will be... after me until I change
wanna break the chains of pain... so I can leave the bills in flames
The wind of change blows... through open windows
So if you leave ya guard open... thats when ya shin goes
Sins glow until you're gone... and showing off fails
Feels like you're always on track... but you're going off the rails
Blame everyone else... its like what you're trained to do
And the only thing thats really changed..... was you
^

...word...this was purty tight, i like this guy for some odd reason, maybe it was the played words he rhymed(j/k) or the niceness of what he said...hmm i'll go with number two...ccccheeeaaa, did a good job..
-memorable lines-
Feels like you're always on track... but you're going off the rails
Blame everyone else... its like what you're trained to do
And the only thing thats really changed..... was you



Deva:
Changes are about growing wiser, from acoustic to an amplifier
Leave education, enter the main frame, start burning the fire
-Desire is the want, leading change, which is taking you higher
To new places, new faces, expanding, broadening mental attire
-Wont be branded a liar, for exceeding my expected limit
Its imminent, im livin it, gone past change, cos im diligent (hard-working)
Another word for evolution - moving present to the distant
Transformation could be used, but the real word aint listed
The basis of life, without it we would be scorned and twisted
Its good to move on from bad times, the crimes a wont miss it……….

-contestant number three-

hmmm....yeah yeah, did good....why?

cuz of

Another word for evolution - moving present to the distant
Transformation could be used, but the real word aint listed

i liked that, maybe its cuz he said it aint listed...

but uhhh yeah u fellas aint rookies so u know ur flows goo, had some aight vocab, some aight multis here and there...
everyone kept the subject matter in tact...
different messages...from youse guys

one dude finishes with
"i wanna give up cuz my life sucked"
second dudes like
"the only thing that changes in life is you cuz u blame everyone else, but its ur fault"
third dude
"i dont know, i dont know i dont know, but uhhh i'll elavate and reach good times and forget the bad...peace"

yeah....thats what i got....
good collab, keep dropping your work fellas

~1~

Masta C: Your flow was real good i thought, your verse was meaningful, and it had good multies, vocab was alright, I was feeling it..
COM: Your part was real good, nice multies in there, was feeling it as well, you had some good lines in there...
Deva: Good verse, nice use of vocab, flow was nice in there, structure was tight, was feeling yours as well..

this was a real good collab guys, was feeling all 3 verses, keep dropping I'll be looking forward to more drops from this crew.

yo nyce by u all and i think Masta C bit was da best wif vocab and da rhyme scheme aiight dats just mi opinion AiIgHt PeAcE

this shit was dope...all 3 came nice in this...some ill imagery by all 3...and vocab was on point...but I was feelin' COM'z multi's a lil' betta than Deva and Masta C...Masta C had some good multie'z too though...and Deva had a nice flow...but he just gettin' started with the multi'z so he ain't got it down completely yet...but ya will soon...and when you do you will be even doper than you already are...

thanx dawgs.......i hear what ya saying thieves
............keep the feed comin and i'll keep giving it......peace yall!

This had a few multis. .I felt the vocab was wwwaaayyyy to basic tho. .Try & work on that to better this good piece. .I thought Deva shined on this one. .COM also had a tight drop. .But the meaning of the liens could of been took up a notch. .But it was a good collab nonetheless. .:)

Hey thanks for the feedback so far, keep the feedback coming, its much appreciated, thanks.

can y'all hit up my new open mic called "That's Life..." now??????

King i just posted some feedback on it, sorry about that....and thanks for the feedback so far, keep it coming.