Try Me
 

Posted in: King Of Theivez, kmfrob, JUS-10

Nothing brings-me-down, cause theres always things-to-clown..
Spit balls to fling-around, hitting you so you cling-the-ground…
Theres just no-miss, cause its like having a slow-bliss…
And just know-this, chances of beating me, slim to none, go-wish...
Just go pray-to-god, cause I will slay-your-squad..
Better off to play-the-odds, cause my lyrics make-ya-nod…
Break-ya-quads…so you can just stay-and-listen..
Hey-ya-pissen, cause im saying it so good ya say-ya-glisten
Like a bat lyrics Beat-ya-face, no need to leak-ya-hate…
Cause ya reak-the-place, and I just speak-ya-fate…
Cause im a Death-maker like The Reaper, just a breath-taker…
A threat-hater, like a heart disease im a chest-acher…
The best-flavor…of choice, with the vocal voice…
Having songs, that cant go wrong, in my lyrics you rejoice..
Lyrics tapping ya brain like morse-code, my words arent coarse-though..
My lyrical source-blows like a volcano with so much force-hoe…
I got punches ya never heard-of, hurts so much like ya first-love…
You think ya the worst-thug ya have water guns to squirt-slugs..
I spit lyrics to decay-ears, im like nightmares I replay-fears…
So I can betray-peers, ya wins like the fountain of youth I delay-years…

a lot of good inteligant rhymes in this, very well done. flow was on point i wouldn't critiue this ...keep it up pz

^word nice vocab and structure...
flow was aight, not great, but aight
7/10
could;ve been longer 2...

Word to ma dawg.....................
..........................................
.......................//...//...

I think your vocab needs to be upped especially the words you rhymed. .I don't think it could of got any more basic. .I say every line had multis. .But maybe thats why you rhymed such, such simple words. .The content was okay. .Nothing really good, yet it wasn't wack. .Try using some more complex lines, ie. imagery, w/p, science(a different perspective thats real. .na'mean)

Pz

so could've been your review, but ok, it was an overall good piece, vocab was nicely put down, wordplays were on point, the subject was kinda "eh", you had pretty tight-nit flow, jus one thing, wen your doing anything its kinda elementary to be using "-" or any other types of signs to point out stuff, if u ever do use it only let it be in a battle, but an overall good piece

hypens suck!
potent told you exactly what im trying to tell you
you NEED to stop forcing the rhymes

that song was raw props big time, that was sick

oh and the realist you should shut your mouth all you do is post on other peoples battles but you don't battle yourself you fucking pussy

damn-sounds like that was a call out!!!but back to masta c, i thought it was aight-6/10--they're right about the vocab, but i also understand that every verse isn't always scientifical or intellectual--sometimes its just straight talking shit.

lol some high tension in here..but thanks for the feedback its all noted, and keep the feedback coming in, its much appreciated, thanks.

Good rhyme choice and flow..elevate and you will have something gold..aight peace

Hey thanks for the feedback, keep the feedback coming in, its much appreciated, thanks.