[week 4] Bribeone1 (2-1) vs Mystery~murdera (2-1)
 

Topic: All Of This Is Circumstance

due date: saturday
judging ends: monday

make it dope......................

Yayy we get assigned topics .......

In M~M lets make this good

fa shizzle my bizzle

Topic: All Of This Is Circumstance

Young charming bachelor had it right with all moves.
edged my way into hearts and left gashing bold grooves.
impressions the soothe, thought I was smooth but slipped.
sipped on the wrong wine and on my own two feet I tripped.
I knew I was wrong, she was completely different from all.
when others fell to my charm, she just kept her heart cold.
Story unfolds to a blossoming flower thats grown to be bitter.
quarreling on inside me when outside I wanted to hit her.
but I'm not a quitter I was entrapped with hope for true love.
meanwhile i was being decked with hate from a push 2 a shove.
above, were those who truly cared advicing me she wasn't it.
but when I saw the exit shed be there at the door facing in.
Finnally after years at it, the door opened and i saw out.
the heart that was frozen solid got heat and was thawed out.
years of drought for feeling left me full of emotion once released.
all of this is circumstance to my true joy, My beautiful kid..........

nice drop my man, I aint feelin this topic but I'll try n drop today...

not feelin this topic. keyin.

All of This is Circumstance

Twan thought he was the man, fuck a circumstance
he was his own man, never give up on his plans
dance with fate, n sleep with sin, felt the evil seepin in
but couldn't cease his grin, faced life with an open smile
broke as hell, but was rich in thought with no denial
bust him? he bust back? ... till he got smoked - at trial

his visions broken, and his platinum dreams shattered
he just wanted to rep strong, shit he had to be a rapper
had an open shot at life, how could he miss the shit?
sat in a cell confused... this is what rappers do isn't it?
no... came the voice, Twan's ears perk - he listens
big n pac visits... bullshit nah gotta be visions
but it goes on, lemme explain our real dreams and visions
slowly but surely he learns rap aint just smoke, screams, and bitches

10 year laters

28 now, Twans outa jail, outa this cell, made bail
everybody say TWs on a different level, excelled he's real
speakin the truth and the truth speaks through him
Fame started as a leak then the stream grew in
See thourgh him a new lyricist was born n raised
His lyrics spoke for him not the Blood, Scornz, n Rapes

But if theres one thing I've learned from man
it's all of this is just circumstance
no beaf but the heat definately burned this man
Left on his body was a pen left firm in hand

Some spite me, some really feel where I'm writing from
Lord forbid they feel me too much... see I'm 17 and afraid
cuz the good die young

blah, whatdya think?

uppin this here

up 1 mo gain

Bribe - Nice take on the topic, dope imagery/storytelling
and the flow and structure were all in places
metaphors were abundant and I enjoyed the piece (especially the bombshell at the end)

M~M - You seemed out of your element here, hardly any metaphors and basic imagery and a storyline ive heard on many a Jay-Z b side. I wasnt feelin ure piece and I could tell you werent feelin the topic. Keep elevatin though.

Vote - Bribe

Drop an honest vote on my SS battle: walter wall vs. akira son bio

well thanx for the vote,

uppin

ok drops by both, solid stories, ok wordplay, mystery had sum nyce ideas with good metas', bribe had sum deep imagery, close battle, tha breakdown:

Bribeone- Rhyme Scheme: 6, Flow: 6.5, Story, 7.5, Total: 20
Mystery M- Rhyme Scheme: 7.5, Flow: 6.5, Story: 7, Total: 21

My vote goes to Mystery, his contents won it, with a solid story, bribe one work on your wordplay and rhyme scheme, no hate, may tha best man win, peep my verse, stay real, peace, 1

both did good on this
bribe..imagery wordplay was good..wasnt liking the rhyme scheme i have to say...was choppy..but the story and content were pretty dope and the ending was a great twist
didnt see it coming

mystery...lacked in imagery and word play....a pretty simple piece
however the rhyme structure and flow helped it alot...was still a good read...quite a good ending to it as well
but...i think bribe won this with better content
although neither stories were original so to speak

props to both

good battle here

I Think That M~M Took It.
His Verse Had More Of A
Feel To It. It Had A Good Feel.
The Writing Was Good.
And I Think Most Aspects
Out did Bribe's.

vote - M~M

I Have To Agree.. Close Shit Here
And You Both Are My Boys But When
it Comes Down To It.. Im Gunna
Have To Swing To MM Here.. Really
Dope Battle But MM Story Hooked
Me In Real Quick. Took Me A Lil While
For Bribes' But Yet, He Came Dope
None The Less...

Vote - M~M