100 bullets rough draft..
 

my part of a collab on the upcoming ima compilation.. rough draft llooking for critique before i rerecord... all replies will be returned.. final will be sacrifice, weapon x, mentore and me.. all replies will be returned..

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/7/m...ogicalmusic.htm

0=shoot yourself

10=Nas/Jay/Big/Rakim


Beat - 5/10

Quality - 6/10

Lyrics - 5.5/10

Flow - 5/10

Delivery - 5.5/10

Emotion - 7/10

Other comments : The fact that you used a punch in every 4 bars is insanely obvious dog, you need to work on gettin the whole verse into one take, or editing it so on the final mixdown its less obviouss. Your emotion was there...that was the best part of this, could tell you have some kinda emotional investment in what you wrote. The flow was kinda choppy based on the fact you had so many punch ins..not that you wasnt on beat..just that you came in a split second to early/late on some punch ins. Overall..nothing Horrible....decent

5.5/10

.pz.

Interesting, see i was feeling the punch ins, however as i listen again a few of them were slightly off, but i like the punch ins though it adds flavor and a continued attack on this beat. I would say that this is good work, i wasn't blown away but yer on the right track i can see a pretty nice finished product with this. Some shit was just spit out instead of expressed for the particular lyrics best delivery. Work on expressing a lil' better your emphasis lines in this song for the final. Decent Drop, i'll look for the final draft when you finish...1

^^ alcatrakz, you should critique every audio:p you broke it down real nice.

this could be good, the emotion was good, the flow was good sometimes, off a bit at others..

the punchins were driving me crazy though, you can tell when your saying two words at once though, i guess bliss liked it, but i just found it hard to listen to, it chops up your flow a lot.

the lyrics were nice though.. i liked them a lot..

^ i like that part of it... it adds to it... like a toss of thoughts from some one with a multiple personality

well i'm feeling the verse...

10/10 good stroy telling ...plus it works with the beat