Parental Split
 

Yo my dad just left my mom so i got some mad shit runnin through my head. Its been bout a week and i havent been able to write well now i can and this is wat i have to say.

People come and leave in this world everyday
But my parents, 20 years, I thought they'd always stay
Its just another heartached burden, written in my soul
My mind has lost control, another scripture in my scroll
My life's like a story of nothin but broken dreams
Lost reality, everythin disappears, leavin me to scream
WHY can't u stay together, i can't take anymore pain
I guess at least it wasn't 4 years ago, i would have slit my vein
I've got things goin good for me, now they drop like glass
Everything in this world is precious, don't let it fly by fast
I'm 18 years old, the only thing i've known is married parents
Now i'll be a statistic fukked up kid with D-vorced parents
Oh well, I'm used to bad shit happening nothin will ever change
I really thought things were goin good, no wonder i felt so strange
I always know bad things are goin to happen, u could almost call me a profit
But fukk man can there possibly be anymore fukkin shit in my life, god fukkin STOP IT
I hate this fukkin world with everythin i'll ever be
Always had a vision of myself, now im blind and can not see
I feel like I'm torn because i have no regret towards either one
I am the only child so theres nowhere else for me to run
The only thing keepin me together is my girl but should i put that trust
Because from everythin i've seen, love is like metal, with rain there will come rust
And rust can shatter with a flick, it's more fragile than thin glass
I wonder if I'll always have these feelings or will they become my past
Who knows about positives in the future, not me but i know the bad
I'll never have parents together, but maybe a stepmom or stepdad
But then again im fukked cuz not even my parents understand me
So how the fukk can a total stranger come into my life and tell me
But I will make my dreams no longer dreams but reality
I can't become a nothing, cuz thats not inside of me
I won't ever listen again to anyone or anything they say
I'm gonna blow up with all words these bad times have to spray
PEACE
-KeMy$t

give me some feedback please this is pure emotion

yo and if u can give this a vote too that would be great
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=90745

fukk i keep forgettin about this 3 post stuff so here they are

Twisted Ayngel - MBP - Wogzta

i wont forget again its in my brain now

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=90191

Yo, this was aight, keep dropping.

Shouts to Fun-demental, MC synical, Ken Dawg, peace.

yo that was tight keep'em goin

uppin

yo kemyst man. first things first. I know what it's like bro I was like 10 or 11 when my parents split up an my dad nearly died just before they broke up and as for me I had 2 older brothers but they never watched out for me durin the time my parents were breakin up and they still don't so I know what ur goin through man believe me. but anyways as far as ur piece go's shit was tight dawg was feelin it. let alone it brings back memories I don't wanna think bout but whatever just another piece of bullshit I gotta live with in my life that and the fact that I was completely on my own for 7 years of my life bein put through hell. shit sorry anyways multi's flow wordplay rhyme scheme and structure was all down man ur vocab was pretty good to. keep doin your thing bro. peace.

thanx for the good feedback dude i appreciate it and ya i wrote this cuz i had to man otherwise it was gonna tear me up but ya lets get some more feedback and hit this battle up w/ a vote
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=90745

yo nyce Peice dawg i like tha read aiight keep it commin i like ya verse it was tha shit aiight keep that shit commin Peace (v)

To sum it all up in a word...DOPE

One of the main reasons I can really relate to this piece is because my parent's have been split up since I was born.

And about doing a collaboration, best believe I'm down. Just PM what ya have on your mind for it and such.

PEACE!

i appreciate the feedback and if there are negatives i want to know dont just feel bad for me cuz this is kinda more of an insperation for me than anythin maybe that is fukked but watever more responses please if u read this then please respond

ill piece man. nice everything. my parents split up for a bit, but then they got back together. maybe that'll happen with yo parents

IM FEELIN THIS VERSE PLAYER. FEEL DA SAME BUT I'M GLAD MY PARENTS SPLIT. READ MY RAP ON OPEN MIC............................................... .................................................. .........

fINALLY, A PEICE i CAN RELATE TO.................pain of parental split came across well and I felt your emotion son.........flow on point, wordplay good.........7.5/10

Nice....flow was there and vocab
i liked the emotion.......nothing better than a bit of emotion
Just keep writing....

6/10

Pz.

thanx for all the feedback hook it up w/ somemore