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Chokedogg aka Youngnut
Reply-Sthash-regarless, Polars half-Sand,Jay R- Mic Life
DOPE LINES MAK RAP ADDICTS OUTTA DETOXEES.... FLOW TO UNORTHADOX U CANT DROP THESE....... MY AIM LEAVE LAMES WIT CEREBAL PALSY LEANS...... U KNOW ITS WAR WIT ME TELL ME WHAT YALL MEAN,NAH MEAN..... ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I know its Stomach turning, niggas cringe when I flow// Just 2 months of learning its like I binge when I flow// When I spit it Acidic liquids burn my enamel// Like gatlins when I'm rappin can't out manuever my ammo// Now that reruns gone, I'm most known 4 poppin// U can't see son in the throne u wasn't given an option// Mics I bless it, u just need 2 digest the flame// Take ya best shot, it will 4ever reflect ya aim// U not in the picture, mind frames just aint the same// My post lyricaly are not for the faint and lame// Flow on point like eskimo nipples literally Shank the brain// It really aint no mystery that u fake insane// epileptics in earthquakes wit straps u got shaky aim//. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- DOPE LINES MAK RAP ADDICTS OUTTA DETOXEES.... FLOW TO UNORTHADOX U CANT DROP THESE....... MY AIM LEAVE LAMES WIT CEREBAL PALSY LEANS...... U KNOW ITS WAR WIT ME TELL ME WHAT YALL MEAN,NAH MEAN..... --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Droppin shit, destroyin hopes of most optimist// Behead enemies leave ya esophagus topless// My cirriculum consist of sicka synonyms// Thoughts in my cerubulum hit and move the other side like pendulums// Young a unsung immortal u can not injure him// Damage ya manhoods, change genders wit tha phlegm// Greatness, I'm so close like lew Al Cindor 2 a rim//. Over heads like condoms, don't understand my uncanny spits// Ya click softer than johnsons after granny on tranny flicks// Murda u 2day com 4 ya squad 2morrow// Sub-machines rise up like Govener Arnold// Hope ya next of kin got lungs up 4 borrow// 4 testin him riddle bodys initial chest like Zorro// ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ DOPE LINES MAK RAP ADDICTS OUTTA DETOXEES.... FLOW TO UNORTHADOX U CANT DROP THESE....... MY AIM LEAVE LAMES WIT CEREBAL PALSY LEANS...... U KNOW ITS WAR WIT ME TELL ME WHAT YALL MEAN,NAH MEAN..... ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Ravenous savage is havin his way, he's unstable// Spits like dillingers do Damage navigate thru ya navel// Autopsy 2 prove u not me examinate on the table// Title of great ya squad need it quadrapledgic disabled// The best who eva writ it, no figmant of imagination// As sure as me walkin in a liq an gettin followed by Asians// U still a dick rider even if u swallow on occasion/ The cat yall hate pour alchohol on all abrasions// Quick 2 pull out diesel like Reginald Dennehy// Ya reign on RA is over unless u a friend of me// Flow blow minds from many angles like u John F Kennedy// Teflon Don step on all mini me's// U eat many emcees me I'm much more finicky//. Blasphamy, is simply unforgivable Simiar 2 ya chick lickin anotha mans genitals// I am the pinnacle// Flow spans like octupus tenticles u still sinnacle/ Salute ya future general//. Power 2 shut u all the fuck up but I'll mute u in intrevals// I'm crushin ya bones droppin ya spinal// Do I have to remind u// I'm part machine mostly beast like Optimus Primal// --youngnut |
needs a lil work but it came real hard and meaningful just needs punches better designed to fit in rhyme
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More feedback huh
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Yo I liked this piece, I definatly liked the fact that you used alot of discriptive words, and the phrases were very fluent. try using less words in your rhymes that sound the same tho, i would definatly love to hear audio to this tho, it was nice
keep it up!... http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...8277#post908277 http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...8313#post908313 |
i liked that shit... good descriptive words, but it does need some workpretty good piece overall though......................................
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it was ok, but its to basic and im not into the bragging stuff, you should try writing to a topic, thats the only way you will really elevate. anyone could do braging tracks but it takes real skill to do a topic.
you aint really saying shit, dont know were word perfect got meaningful lines from. |
this was a nice yet total peice right here... seems like its good n ready to be spat n rec over a beat n shit.. lyrics were nice for the most part... the hook was missin something.. not quite sure what it was but it didnt take from the track though.. put it 2 a beat yo.1
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Respect 2 all feedback, can i get some more
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