Hostility
 

“Hostility”


Sometimes I feel as if no one cares
Sometimes I feel people just stop and stare
To me life has been wicked and so unfair
It fills me with hatred and despair
As soon as I learn to love “they” no longer care
Even when “they” promise to forever be there
I’m all alone, where I’m going is nowhere
Someday I hope to regain that gleam and glare
In my eye’s you can see all the pain I wear
Pain and darkness they follow me everywhere
I once had a family who no longer cares
I had a father who was never there
Yet a man like me is so very rare
A man like me does not come in pairs
A whirlwind of emotions so numb and unaware
The very fabric of my life now starts to tear
A fire burns deep inside hot as flair
Violent thoughts and evil voices start to Blair
Driving me crazy with anger as I pull out all my hair
Losing family again is something I can not bare
Destruction of my soul how can “she” not care

Mad dogger in the street step up if you dare
Homicidal maniacs coming at me from everywhere
If it’s pain you want then my pain I’ll share
Don’t you pretend like you were unaware
Punk mother fucker don’t you stop and stare
Hell’s your next stop do you want to go there
The viciousness within me you can not compare
Cold and penetrating is my calculated stare
Hostility programmed and imbedded so you better beware
As a youth I seen and done more than most ever dare
Criminology not ideology was my major care
Street pharmaceuticals in a clandestine lab I did prepare
DEA fumbling and stumbling looking for me everywhere
Infamous and notorious evading their tactical stare
C.R.A.S.H. on the hunt looking for me everywhere
Counter intelligence is my forte, the situation’s so unfair

You can not contain the elusiveness of my brain
One step ahead I continually maintain
Heightened cerebral focus while inflicting the pain
Mass casualties to your U/C’s do you wish to sustain
Sidewalk outlined in chalk drenched with blood stains
Evidence will not wash away even with 100 years of rain
Anticipating and manipulating your every movement in vein
The headlines read yet another U/C slain
I had nothing to lose compared to your nothing to gain
Your ignorance supercedes your arrogance now that was plain
You tried to bring me down but I’m still in this game
With the politics played I put you all to shame
Can’t catch what you can’t see, that’s my claim to fame
Looking for me you didn’t even know my name
Informant snooping around my block took two in the brain
One more family lost a father tell me how they maintain
One more family grieves needlessly, tell me can you explain
Your motivation to catch me at my motha fucking game
All the intelligence you had didn’t even mention my name
The viciousness within me you’re never going to tame
South Gate PD thought they had me, now they feel lame

I exposed thier operation, got off on a technicality
This account is all based on fact and actuality
Ruthless in aggression and excessive brutality
South Gate PD don’t you wish you never fucked with me
Initiated that probe that exposed you internally
Exposed countless records of your vicious brutality
Venting your rage on the Hispanic community
Violating the rights of the innocent minority
Big mistake my people will soon be the majority
Tables turned and now you’re the minority
Now tell me can you feel my hostility


By: Mr. Bouncer

This is just a simple structured vent, a reflection on events and times in my life that have created the man I am today. Those of you that know me, also know I have a colorful back ground for lack of better words. I am working on a book, so these small looks into what made me, are a way for me to piece together my life and times.

Respectfully submitted.

Wow.. I was just going back looking at posts and I saw this one.. and I saw it had no responses. WHY didnt I READ THIS BEFORE! :o ... anyway..

This had ill emotion in it... but the flow is what caught my eye and made me read it the whole way through. Its so long, I didnt think I'd be able to read it, but it didnt take long at all. The flow just made everything go with ease quickly as I read it. AMAZING drop. I love it.

VERY NICE my friend, i liked this alot

I could feel your raw emotion, seems like you just started writing and dident stop, just telling your shit..

very simple structure but it works oh so good, i think the simplicity
adds something

again Very Nice

thhnks for actually reading it, I know it's longgggg!

Yeah it's kind of raw, I was just venting. I hope it was worth your time to read it. Thanks so much for the feedback as this is a non fiction tyoe drop....

Bounce

Wow, great piece. Sorry i didnt get to this before. Most ppl are sleepin on this because its so long, but as ayngel said, it doesnt take that long to read it. In my view, it had a lot of imagery, took me right there as it was happenin. This, in my opinion, is an amazing drop. The flow and scheme were awesome and everything was great on it. Keep up tha great work. Most respect.

I dont think you let people into who you really are very often do you Bounce? Maybe, from lessons learnt in how that leaves you vulnerable... Gawd knows it does.
The first verse in this piece, you came close... close to actually revealing a little of who you are inside, your deepest fears, your everyday private thoughts.. I caught a glimpse.. and then you shut me down.
Often, showing our vulnerabilty is thought a weakness.. in my opinion, that is a misconception. It takes courage to reveal that vulnerability, courage and trust.

The 3 following verse', to me, portrayed the person you want people to see. I read what you've experienced, Ive read how you handled it, but I still have no idea how you felt.. really felt... deep inside where our insecurities dwell. I could say I sensed pride in your actions, but even then I dont think thats accurate. I think you have outgrown that...
I didnt feel your hostility, because I didnt feel. I just read. I didnt feel you, feeling anything in this piece.. You just wrote. Its like someone telling me they are angry, but when I look at them, I see no anger. Hollow, if you will. Factual. Non feeling. (Hence the reason you rarely share your real self with people).

This was a well written peice. I felt at times, you were repeating yourself a little, just for the sake of making it longer, or spacing it out.. hard to explain, just felt a little forced at parts.

I see you are writing a book.. I think a book would be more your forte regarding your life story, as you obviously have alot to say... and trying to squish it all into these 4 verses made it a little laborious to read... I know, Id be hard pressed to fit the last 3 years of my life into 4 verses lol
Interesting times you have had Bounce.

Thank you all very much for taking the time to reply. Those who know me also know I appreciate and incorperate your feedback. I look to you all in my pursiut of elevation, one I would never attain with all your countless words of advice.

Twizted Angel and dthsmissingangel, it's a pleasure ladies, you two are wonderfull. I want you to know that if you ever need me for anything, to read a drop or just some advice, I am completly here for you. I look forward to reading more of your work. Stay focused and remain strong, much respect Mija's..

Dr. Gonzo, I like your enthusiasim, your a really up beat person, I liked that alot. I am glad you enjoyed my drop, it's people like you that make RB fun and productuve. Keep repping RB hommie.

Tourniquet, you are most familar to me. I remember you from other threads and have appreciated your contributions, although we have not always shared the same views we can respecfully differ on matters such as politics and the conflict oversea's. It is people like yourself I love to interact with, please keep that a constant about yourself. You voice your views in a respectable and well detailed manner, I really admire that, wish i COULD SAY THE SAME FOR EVERY MEMBER.

You are right about me not letting people in on who I really am. You hit the nail on the head with that statement, but at the same time it is not for reason you have described. I can and have allowed my feelings to surface onto the meduim of music. I have posted some raw emotion on this board in the past, it's easy for me to express emotion. I do not go into to detail for reasons others on this site already know. I do not discuss myself in detail for those very same reasons, my career does not allow me the luxory of doing so. Once I am relieved of my post, I will publish that book I have been preparing my whole life.
As of today it's a conflict of interest where my career stands. I do support my nations deffense and have for some time now, although I am not an enlisted man! I thank you for always offering a well detailed reply and helping us improve in our quest for elevation. This piece was writting as a rap, it's song and the auido forced me to repeat certain lines jsut to keep up with the tempo of the rap. It was tough at first but then I removed some complex words and replaced them with easier to spit type. I may post the audio one day, it's not only up to me, other people were involved in it's production, so until I get approval from everyone, I can only post my text portion.

Thanks to all

Bounce

Upping for the very last time.......

Tourniquet hes not really supposed to...theres a dont
ask dont tell them policy thats imprented in our heads
and it goes for far more than just homosexuality....
im not gay...my girlfriends beautiful..now that thats
cleared..but the phrase is in reference to how the
life is lived day in and day out....

Bounce anyones stupid messing with you in real life...

as for your poem it was long and you kept a simple
rhyme scheme all the way through but also had the
emotion and vocabluary to back you up all the way
through and keep my attention...it honestly seems like
something that I would hear from P.O.D when they
were worth listening to..the talents definately shown

if anything this ups my statements of you being a great artist

^Yeah content, it's hard for people to understand deffense mentality, it's not something natural to human charecter. It's something you have learn over time, and or extreme circumstance. When you sign articles that call for your punishment by death for devulging sensitive information, you lear to keep things locked up. Not only the sensitive issues, just things in general. Hey who are we kidding most these kids are too young or too set in thier ways to understand or even care to understand.

Thanks for taking the time to read this, even thought it's not something I would consider 'good' in any use of the term. I respect your comments on an artisitic level and then some, but this really is not something I would consider worthy. Just a vent. A rap, I rap for fun, but my poetry is more along the lines of art.

If you drop back in, do me a favor and leave a reply on something I would really like you to read. It's in this same thread.

~An Evolutionist's plot~

I have recieved some good feed on it by V and Necro as well as tourniqiet, this drop is a good conversation piece, very complex and deep, it's something I have wanted to hear your feedback on. Even discuss if you have the time.

Stay strong...

Respect to all...

Well that makes sense to me lol Explains why the rhythm had me reading it faster than I normally would.. because the rhythm was strong.. Unfortunately, I am in no way a vocal artist ('rapper' if you will) so found myself tripping over the words a little.. ergo my comments.
Now, that I know you are of the military mentality, your 'closed off' writing makes sense to me also :) T.

I am one misunderstood type of guy for sure, but once you take the time to peel away a layer or two, people start to understand me. Then it's like ohh that's what you were getting at, I see, no wonder you did things like this or that. I am fairly easy to get to know and understand after that. So yeah I am glad I could shed a little light into the darkness that be me.

And please don't let my horrendous spelling or ghettofabulas verbage fool you.

Me's not's as dumbs as me's sounds, I'm much worse...

~Bounce~