Curruption
 

I’m tired of this killing, these wars, and these deadly games
Don’t trust your neighbors they’ve all gone insane
Children in a foreign land, dying for the man
Fighting for oil and money and power
The whole political scheme has gone way past sour
Flip to CNN and catch the story of the hour
Newsflash many Americans dead, that’s right that’s what they said
A hidden agenda, the president’s aiming for something more
“They’ve got weapons of mass destruction I swear…”
“I mean I saw them they were there…”
“But hell now they could be anywhere…”
Cause if there not with us there against so it time to FIGHT
Secure our world and protect our free rights
Cause until there dead, don’t turn off your lights, and don’t sleep at night
Using tactical word play and imaginary elusions to spread the fright
Cause they could attack at any time
And if you want to be safe sign this line __________
Go ahead sign away your soul, be a good citizen, know your role
Now go shout from the top of the highest tower...
All hail President Bush, the Third Reich is back in power!

although i didnt care much for the subject matter
your poem was good
you got your point across without losing me and you painted a picture in my mind
the rhyming skeems could use a little work
but for the most part a good poem

Ya i thought this one might stir up a little controversy in people

you used words to express your thoughts really well, I didn't see anything wrong with it except for the fact that instead of "Fighting for oil and money and power" fighting for oil, money and power, and try to even the amount of words per line out, besides that, it was really nicley done, keep em commin'

The content was good...
I liked what you were saying but you didn't say enough and you jumped through your emotions too quickly to make a proper impact.
It is very difficult and seems pointless sometimes but presentation is very important.. you need to work on that.

.peace.