inside
 

inside my body I feel hate and despair
im always like fuck you i dont care
my mind is feild with demonds trien to get out
somthins in my rymes i just wanna scream and shout
my life has been like a burning place(hell)
I can feel the flames all up on my face
Poeple dyin my mama cryin stilli cheatin lyin
you think thats bqad im definin
my life '
just pain and strife
I go to school get in a fight
then i come home and get on this site
this site makes me feel like im at home
atleast i dont feel like im alone!

basic rhyme scheme.. basic structure... basic emotion.. this was overall basic. too short, spellcheck. I wasn't feelin this.. it was aiight though... peep otha peoples shit n drop some crit. No hate.

It was ok. Overall as Angel said it was kidna basic. Nothin special. yea u had ure emotions there but in poetry you cant think too hard. just let it come to you and write it down. all about expression. But the only way to get better is to keep spittin.

Overall Grade:

5/10

^agreed with ill and ayngel. However, like they said it was good. Just remember to let ur emotions and thoughts flow and kinda free like <technical terms>

Overall, I liked it. Basic and short, but u got ur point across. thats wut counts. Keep em comin. Much respect