Life
 

Yesterday I wasn't hungry, and my girl was in the house
the bills were paid after scracthing crumbs up like a mouse
my seed was playing teddy with my momma on her bed
at ten i kissed my baby, said goodnight to sleepy head
me and my girl kissed and cuddled,
told me to sleep coz i'm tir-ed
things was nice and quiet in my peaceful little crib
but that was yesterday, today its quite different
i'm standing in an long line cos my boss fired my ass
my girl, she was good- then met a nigga with more cash
momma's cussin me, and wants to take nizzel away
she bought some lady over and won't listen to what i say
my baby, she screaming 'daddy' while their taking her away
I can't hire a lawyer, cos this nigga hadn't been paid
Now I can see my daughter only one a week
the bitch is gone forever, sucking dicks to earn her keep
lord take me out this pothole, i don't wanna live this way
thats my life. and thats all i have to say

You need to leave 3 names or 3 links to peoples feedback or this will get deleted...

But this was ok....it was simple but a decent read....structure was alright, try making the lines the same length though cause you have some small ones in there....flow was alright got off at a few spots though, try adding some multies and internals to that...overall this was ok...keep at it and keep dropping.