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-   -   what I need to cash a check 4? (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=96093)

CapoDon 12-02-03 11:56 PM

what I need to cash a check 4?
 
you cant fuck wit a nigga like me
imagine me goin down
when dont nobody go down round me
and if I pull the trigga now
you'll be down by 1,2,3
and the one you speak of
run through hos like hos wit visas
rush through doors wit 4's and sweepers
push whores down strolls pull tricks on beepers
young mac keep stacks like piles of paper
no contract bomb sacks like styles in vegas
I be where the best weed grow
and flow wit the best heat 4
when niggas come step but dont test me ho
aint even drunk yet where the remy XO
now im ready lets go to the telly get dro
we can blow and get served by the next ho
got drug money what I need to cash a check 4?

Menik 12-03-03 01:24 AM

You need to post 3 links or 3 names of people you left feedback in or this will get deleted..

But this was ok...your structure in this one was better than the other one i read, still try to make the lines around the same length though...your flow was alright, but you need to add multies and internals to it to make it better...vocab was ok, could be up'd though....overall this was alright....keep at it.

Farse 12-03-03 03:23 AM

not bad like masta c said better sturcture

Edicius 12-03-03 10:48 AM

Follow the rules this willl be deleted shortly if u dont ..follow them

CapoDon 12-03-03 09:24 PM

structure? prolly if your reading it, but it flows smooth on a beat


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