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-   -   Hardtimez (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=96920)

rayman g 12-06-03 05:41 PM

Hardtimez
 
when i sit down quiet , writing my rhymez
all i do is think 'bout tha hardtimez
me and ma niggaz breaking it down
all tha time when i fuck around ,and get inside jail
livin' in this bad lifestlye
gotta stop tha weed up , gettin' eased up
inhale gettin' wheezed up,stressed out trying to flee up
its all about tha hardtimez ,how'd i fall down into all these crimez
how'd lose myself , no pleasing myself
i got no love in my life ,thug til i die ,watch me fly
i can't change , ill stay tha same
always stuck in this game , and have HARDTIMEZZ

Menik 12-06-03 05:47 PM

You need to leave 3 links or 3 names of people you left feedback to or this will get deleted..

Your structure in this was better than your other pieces i thought, keep that up man...your vocab could be a little better though i think, just try and work on that then....flow was ok, add multies and internals to help it out though....but just keep at it.

E-Lude 12-06-03 06:11 PM

i didn't think it was that great. your flow was a little off and ur structure wasn't all there. just keep at it.


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