PINEST. volume 2
 

A nappy headed blond shedding tears of joy
eyes shut in fear of seeing my momma unemployed
annoyed, and broke
seems pops still aint payin child support
I know its hard raise'in us alone
momma dont loose hope
make a note 2 tell my momma that i love her
an hug her wit nothing else we still have one another
in dis cluster fuck of endless summers
these mendless wounds have yet 2 b closed
and tended 2
rendered helpless i refuse 2 be abused
never payed attention
2 buisy being young an reckless in da process
blessed wit so many freinds in da projects
the nonstop seemed 2 never stop
hop fences, boost pawn shops, an watch 4 cops
haha

Im a cracker 2 the core
naturally born
white and poor
straight off da ambilical cord
wit a Colt 45 4 all my people 2 pour
onto the floor
2 celibrate the comin of the glory
of the lord

only 7 years a child
sparkin up ports, black & milds
departed hearts lack da mind 2
understand violence
why is momma cryin tears streamin outa a black eye
an i understand if u fee suicidal at times
momma it'll b alright
ur loving sun is always at ur side

this one goes out 2 my mother, Donna
my family back in da projects, locklear Court
all da project children trippen immortal on Pine ST.
an all across da nation
peace

This was a cool piece i enjoyed the read had nice flow to it and it was kinda sad so the emotion was there keep it coming mang 1..

Favorite Lines..


Nice..1

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but this was ok...you structure could use a little work though i thought, you should try to keep the lines around the same length instead of having short and long lines, it makes it structured better, and helps the flow out as well....flow in this was alright....vocab was ok, could have been up'd though...but keep at it.

yea it was a alright piece flow was ight vocab ok wordplay ok puches nada and multis ok over all 5/10