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Old 12-23-03, 10:05 AM   #2
menolin
\/ pissing me off!!!!
 
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Posts: 2,122
From: UK
IP:

you should of posted this in open mic,

structure- all your lines need to be about the same length

wordplay/vocab- you need to use better vocabulary, an you need to be more creative with your wordpla.

use more metaphors.

i advise you to read battles, in front line, elevated front lines, an elite front lines.
keep readin battles, an then eventually you will want to battle, an usually elevation comes naturally!!

peace
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