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Old 01-03-04, 06:23 PM   #11
168
Flyweight
 
Posts: 162
IP:

nephew

Aight LM, listen here you think you slim, but yo life is bout to get grim//
THe promise land is goin to hell,lights gettin really really dim//
As yo place go to hell and I prevail, you fail, this shit I can tell//
My moms goina hafta bail me outa a RB jail cause I murder ya, tired of tha cell//
I'd get out and do it again if possible, but there are abstacles in tha way//
You gone, so its impossible, damn I wish I could replay that play//
These lyrics went deep in yo chest, no vest can save ya, in tha grave you is//
I tell , you out cause you was bout nothin, then this happens//
After tha lyrical cappin, I pull my lyrics out ya pocket//
Cause we both know you cant hack it//
Not a thing you have can back it//
So don't try and pack it//
You may be a witch practicin witchcraft//
I rip out yo driveshaft and beat ya with it, damn piece of shit//
You 16 with a insight of a 3 yr old so dont act bold//
I told ya, don't fuck with J, your life is gettin cold, this you behold//
I'll shoot u wit frozen paint balls, watch ya fall//
I'll boot u with these size 11s, watch ya fall//
Put that on yo Adam's apple, watch ya gag for air//
Throw you in a crusty body bag cuase I don't care//

ok verse good pounches some wordplay
bad structre and it didn't flow
elevate dawg

no hate

LM

Dawg your bout to get merked for the 2nd time...
Coz your whack, log off you should learn to rhyme...
You aint got a decent line so give up the game...
You should take up jazz to make your fuckin name...
Rap/jazz, to you it's all the same thats why your pathetic...
Plus your a fat bitch, always at your PC and not athletic...
You battle me and you'll regret it coz you cant compete...
I'm on my 7th line and mutherfucker your already beat...
All dope MC's stand up, J stay on your seat you aint dope...
You say you gon' get win after win but bitch you livin in hope...
You get merked by the pope while he's asleep at night...
And rb knows your faggott and will back down from any fight...
Your profile says you like write lyrics, BMX and kickbox...
You forgot to mention your gay and suck loads of cocks...
Fuck it do I really have to rap, I woulda won this if I just started to beat box...

better overall verse better and stronger pounchs personals wordplay metas structure and flow

-----vote LM---------

vote for my battle in sig

i took the time

peace
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19-13
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