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Old 01-17-04, 06:41 AM   #19
Dev
1E
 
Posts: 1,512
From: N.E.England
IP:

thought this was a pretty straight read, apart form the layout, centering it,.... liked the way you carried ya rhyming, really got the flow going... apart from one bit in the middle...

If you know the car will reck, then keep the seat belt fascend//
There are many intentions, but were ordering wrong missions//

^^if this was fixed, it would have been bout 9/10.... cos the structure, vocab n shit was on point... and the concept was good, thought you could have closed it a bit stronger tho, but it was still done decent.... and the word play was there...so... as it is ill give it 7.5/10......
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