Thread: my dad
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Old 01-19-04, 07:58 AM   #9
Dev
1E
 
Posts: 1,512
From: N.E.England
IP:

basically i agree what is being said, the feeling was in there, but the rest was basic.... try and expand on your vocab and scheme... cos at the minute the flow is way off.... it would have made for a much better read with more thought put into it... but as it is, it ok, but needs work.... jus keep at it....l
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