Feeble Minded
he's thick as a forest. . and so wack he made me key
kid likes the bush... so he campaigned to save the trees ..
the punch in here was ok.. meta w/p was nice not the best opening
im too tired to try, so i'll beat him the fast way ..
you'll make like smokers.. cuz you'll leave in an ash tray...
ok meta...follow through was a lil played, i was expecting more
a bashed gay, harmless faggot kid - im convinced he is ..
so if you post up something dope, it must be coincidence
good line, had me laughin, pretty streight punch
cuz whenever you drop, we all know its wack as shit
i'll kill 2 birds with one stone.. & throw his verse back at him
meta was ok, punch could have come harder... good line though
fuck you up good... make this battle a nice mauling
fuck rhythmic hints..you need a whole advice column
personal wasnt bad, ending could have been set a little better

Punchs were ok ( could have had more personals in it)
Rhyme scheme/ flow was on target ( better multis coulda helped)
Meta/word play was decent (could have tryed a little harder on it)
Opener/ending could have been improved(nothing specil)

16/20


~Rhythmic Hits~

You need ta stay hooked on phonics,your bout to be exceeded/
Ima father,you a fetus,I been spittin since before you was semen/
Not really feeling your opener.. not really seein a punch
Fuckin bitch, touchin mes a no-no/
You aint even aight, you so-so, couldnt "see me" if I sent you a photo/
better, meta here was played.... weak punch
I could drop 2 bars & be done/
Because your spits is reused like everyone elses, feel like Im watchin re-runs/
overdrawn bar, had possibilities, being overdrawn kinda killed the punch, but i see what you were hitten, try a little better rewording
Its apparent shit, but you probably aint aware of it/
My rhymes birthed you, if I died youd be parentless, I could spit this in ancient Arabic/
had me sorta smilin, though the arabic part seemed rushed for the next bar.. punch was ok
You useless, last-supper ruthless Judas/
I confused this music student like he was a cubic rubix/
not bad.. although it seemed like you were trying to force your multi a little bit the punch was iight, ending could have been better

Punchs werent really directed, wasnt that many of them ( nothin really personal, seemed like a generic verse)
Rhyme scheme was to choppy and overdrawn, (sorta seemed forced, althought had alot of potential)
Metas/ wordplay your metaphors were ok, could have had some better wordplay in your verse ( played lines, not really hitting on your opponent, again not to directed)
Opener/Ending Ya opener just jumped right in, your ending was a little better than Feebles but your verse structure isnt really working for me..

14/20


Vote - Feeble Minded

He came with more personals, better punchs, over all better structure and a more creative