hmm, its an ok poem. it woulda been better if u would have not touched on so many things. like keep it on topic. in a way i also like the different things because it keeps it from being boring. the rhyme scheme could have been better. the message is very good, and somewhat secretive till the end. the vocab was ok.

vocab-7/10
rhyme scheme-7/10
message-8/10
similes and metas-7/10
feelings-9/10
overall-38/50
final thoughts=good overall poem, i felt it could have been better, but it didnt bore me, which is hard to do. i felt like there wasnt enough time spent on this poem. still turned out good. hope ya write more, so i can read more

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