Eh...

Good use of multi's...

Perhaps too many, but the flow was there.

Format sucked, though...
Lines were extended too long.

Also, there was no wordplay, metas, or complexity.

This was all straight forward except for the multi's.

Good story, good imagery.

Alot of potential.

Just lay off about a third of those multi's...

And replace it with complexity.

Peace

__________________
Merkings will occur Monday thru Friday, 8 am thru 5 pm, C.S.T.
For my convenience, not yours!