Outside...
Taste of Sweat Reminds, of Such a Time...
When Joy I'd Find as Ambers Raced My Mind...
I Lay Motionless, Breathing Deep, Hard to Regain...
...The Satisfaction Therapists Planted, Within My Brain...
Obsession? Me!...Lose Sanity? So Far From The Truth...
However...
More Time I Have To Ponder...My Denial Is Mute...
Truth Rejected Another Minute, Arising Inside, A Spirit...
...That Screams, I Can Hear It, Fight Back, Now I Fear It...
Poison Pushes It Back...Vodka My Quick Remedy.....
Yet When The Last Drops Run...Invite Back My Enemy...
Conscience Rendered Weak...The Yelling...Nobody's There...
Flame at My Feet, Torch My Eyes...Complete Control Impaired....

Within…
Fall Back Into The Darkness...Tap The Memory Stored...
Obsession Seeped Through Barricades ...Awake In My Core...
Standing Above The Innocent...Resentment Grows To Lunacy...
Clock Is Long Run Out...Gas's Scent Drifts So Beautifully...
The Key To My Urges...Sparks....Smirk Arose From The Flame...
I Hold It Above...Dangling...One Last Thought Before Ablaze...
I Now Shadow My Family...Unaware...They Sleep In Peace...
Unaware of The Gasoline...Life or Death...On My Release...
All Of A Sudden, The Flame Disperses…Threat Subdued?...
I Reverse Back To Reality, I’ll Be Back To Follow Through…

Outside…
Back To My Senses…Trying To Fight Images Made…
It Wasn’t Me, Don’t They Believe…I Cannot Escape?...
Burden’s Weight Is Immense…I Hide It With Caution…
Goddess of Fortuna…Spin Your Wheel…
Or Better Yet…
Take Me Off It…
I’m A Victim of God’s Game…I’m Only Praying That …
…He Rolls Snake Eyes…Before I’m Defined…Pyromaniac…
Cause Death? My Family? That was not through my ambition…
My Mind’s Been Blinded…
By Him Within…
And My Condition…
Falling Back n’ Forth…Reliving Horror…Pain Embedded…
God And Satan’s Sport…
I’m The Tool Used…
Between Hell And Heaven…
He’s Traveling Through My Veins…My Heart…He’s All Of Me…
Yet…
This Is More Defined… Attempts Again To Gain Reality…
Can’t Witness It Again…Glimpses… Hard Emotional Ties…
So It’s Time To Embrace This Being… Losing Faith To Even Try…


Secrets Released…
My Family Settled Still…The Flame I Hold In Hand…
Gasoline Fumes Fill The Nostrils…Still On My Command…
My Father Looks Up As He Is Tasseled…Held Still On The Bedding…
I Spoke Softly With A Grin… Dad, Do You Remember At The Wedding?...
…When I Was Staring At The Cake, Quiet…Easily Handled…
You Said It’s Just The Wax Melting…
Yet..,
I Didn’t Mind The Candles…
The First Time I Noticed It… Fire…Birthed A Being In My Corpse…
Now I Must Awake It In You…My Apology… But By Force…
I Leer Into This Torch…It Answers Me…My Only Therapy…
So As It Helps Me…
I Answer…It Is A Being…Both Are Sharing Me…
If You Could Only Trust…This Feeling So Pure & Honest…
Start To See Life’s Value Cheap… Futures A Broken Promise…
And No One Will Blame Me…’A’ Grades Plus Your Payroll…
Turned Me Into Satan Himself…With A Store-Bought Halo…
Look…At This Flame? It Waves With An Abstract Language…
It Grows Tiresome of Hunger…Starving For More Anguish…
No More Patience…I Watch The Lighters Luminance And Breath…
As The Smoke Signals My Release…I Watch The Fire As I Feed…