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IP:
iight...
Unlike half of the people in this thread... Ive read it... So a can give some decent feedback...
This is making a good 3 part 'epic'... Lol... Looking forward to part three...
Back to this one...
Vocabulary in this was like... Whoa... Maybe too much... Like Devvy Boy said... But its not a major problem... That is the only thing that a can see wrong with it...
It was a good idea to seperate the verses like you did... Because a solid block of writing wouldnt of suited this piece...
You had nice wordplay...
Concept is really forming...
You say this is your favourite piece... Nah... Might be yours... But mine will always be Journey... Illness...
Keep it at this standard and you will be remembered forever... Lol...
Pz man...
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