you grabbed my attention with the first line. you gave this piece a strong opener, with a great flow, awsome vocab, and good structure.it read smoothly and sounds good outloud. i like the way you approached the topic and molded it. kept it interesting and alive by all the little turns of direction in it. your imagery was great, had good detail and kept it unique. the ending was also unique, that way you put it and all. showed good emotion and was overall a strong piece.

~Tera~
DONT HATE

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