this was a coo piece...i liked the vocab u put in here....helped up the imagry an ish...ive neva read anythin from u befo but im glad i have...i enjoyed this piece...this part stuck out to me howeva:

Really, they are owned, jealous of the steam that made the air its only home.
Puppets, raised on strings for the entertainment of the Lords
That sit high, looking down, cherishing their thrones,

its a great bit...one suggestion i would make is juz kill the really...redundent...or somethin i unno it just seems to take somethin from it...but i love the emotions thrown out in here...

hope to read mo of ur work..plz return the favor

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