ayo, killing you bitch is my goal, to end your life in a tradgedy//
putting each contact adressed in a mutha fuckin cemetary//
this was a weak opener, it had a weak flow and the punch wasn't very good either
im-a-spit-fucker, makin-people-quit, like retirein u b4 to old//
im a lyrical demen slayer, your like an underdog sleepin playa/
got no brain waves, bump into mine power blasting like a rave/
i'll stop you growing, stop you stunned and parolysed loseing//
feel my flow it'll melt you down vapourising, as if i was the sun//
im gonna break through you like a million metal objects stabbin you/
leaving your body in a heap telling your boys your just sleeping//
im a outrageous human bein, putting you down instantly without blinkin//
the rest doesn't flow at all, you missspelled alot, its just all in all not good,- No solid punchlines, no good wordplay- try and check out some of the tutorials here and get a better grasp on what ur tryin to do..

/Choppin Fine Mind So Call Me Hannible Lectre/ Snap Crackle 'n' Poppin wit Devine Lines 'n' Turn To A Cannibal Spectre/3
//This Male Anal Investigator Got A Loud Bark But No Bite// Fail To Contest Like A Old Man Wit False Teeh In This Fight//4

/Comin Up Short In More Ways Than One, Ya Midget Dick Not Reachin Tha Pussy Port,Ya Hot Dog Can't Make Tha Bun/5
//Stun Wit High Voltage Tazers, Only Pussy You Get Comes In Tons That Needs Lawn~mowers To Act Like Razors//6

I just quoted a couple verses here-- This was much better it actually had punchlines in it, a decent flow good wordplay-- the struc was a little strange but it was consistent- Your opponent should try and elevate to this level at least very quickly.... Vote - Fourmost

__________________