Rumble and rage u destine to die as you countin ya days
U doubting the ways u pray, $moke got you lost in tha haze
This Flowed alright, but weak for an opener- no real punchlines a little wordplay off haze and your name but nothing spectacular.
Feelin’ the Blaze It’s Hot the $Rich’s is stuck in tha cage
I staged the end of ya chapter now I’m flippin’ tha page
Again, the structure and flow is good, but not a real strong punchline
Connectin’ punches wit ya Jaw and Bitch I’m hittin you hard
Watchin you fall turn to the crowd and watch em applaud
This was a better punchline- still good flow
Deadly venom spittin at cha, with one bite you’ll be dead
Ya lyrics Suck, wouldn’t be bright wit a fuckin light on ya head
heres some wordplay, better punch again
You’ll verbally curse ya verse and leave a horrible impression
Keep spittn wack verses and you gon’ end up wit a ugly infection
good flow, but i think you coulda re-worded this 2nd line for maximum effectiveness
You couldn’t spit a good verse if you was reading a scripture
God forgive me but this stupid clown just don’t get the picture
first line was o.k but you shoulda finished with a hard punch- this didn't do it
I’m done wit this cat I’m out… I got nothin’ to prove
Here’s where the audience covers their mouth, points at u and you hear a big
OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
lol, kinda funny closer, not bad. Decent verse overall.


my mind is feeble and i'm built to destroy, i designed evil/
i can't be hit cause i "stick~and~move" like "blind~people"/
lol nice opener, good wordplay strong punchline here.
you flowin' recklace, kid you just "failed~the~test"/
plus ya spellin' is all jumbled like an "essay~without~a~spell~check"/
the structure is off a little, but decent punch
i aint a gangsta but don't under estimate me/
gotta big heart but please don't try to play me/
I think it kinda fell off a little on these two lines, really basic here
i'm dangerous, the last emcee to step i tossed him/
chopped his body and left the pieces in the "Creek~with~Dawson"/
Dawsons Creek Punchlines is kinda played and you didn't aim this at your opponent- two things to watch for in the future.
i was told to flow from the heart so thats what i'm doin'/
this kid smokeskreen's career i'm bout to ruin/
decent flow- no real hard punches though
plus i'm jackin' you for ya lunch and i'm takin' ya last buck/
and the "bathrooms~aint~free" so you "shit~out~of~luck"/
lol- funny, you set this up pretty well- good punchline.
you think you illa than the illest, how you figure/
i "eat~emcees" all day and still manage to "keep~my~slim~figure"/
lol, that was tight- structure goes off a little again but it flows good- good punch
i'll end it with a teaser to sit and watch ya brains spill/
even if you used "i will" abbreviated you still couldn't be "ill"/
This was a tight closer.. very creative wordplay with i will and ill... I think Your verse had a couple points where maybe you didn't try so hard but all in all the whole thing was above average, good punches, I liked your wordplay- the rhymes weren't simple but very easy to understand... Good battle you two but i give the vote too... Rich P

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