Originally Posted by Apotheosis

WOAH. First off sort ur structure, it makes us catch the flow alot easier.

set it out like this instead....


At first this was a game, step in my path now ill leave you in vain
"Cum" out yo brain look mother fucker IM insane...

Not bad rhyme scheme, vocab was simplistic but good effort. Sort ur structure tho, thats ur main problem that can be changed in immediately..stay writing.