killlah :
Last time out this nigga was claimin this and that
Matta fact I had his ass shook from want to clap
^from want to clap?...atleast it's a personal...
Suprised face to face you couldnt look in my eyes
Head down low prayin to God askin- crying why oh why
^weak...
You lookin for me nigga you might wanna pass today
Have ya bitch ass lost in ya words like Hanks on Castaway
^weak metaphor...think a lil' more
He claimin he on top like Mase and Brandy
Not knowing Im up there just to lace his family
^no...
Watch me nigga Im bout to get buck wild
Fuck this freestyle bitch you just walked the Green Mile
^no...
Street Legend:
You should continue to battle newbs thats the only thing u do decent
the column for ya loses are steadily increasin
^no...atleast its a personal...
Ima lyrically demolish this foe, handlin all altercations
Vivid words will cause penetration, havin ya heart wastin
^no...
Im estimatin that at an approximation
of one spit i will leave this guys verse with deterioration
^no...
dawg you are humorusly overrated, constanly stimulated
by feed back based on exaggerration
^personal atleast...worded horribly...but its a personal
hot shit i spit man verbs are subliminal
claimin i won my last battle against him on visual
^no...
Overall:...hmmmm...not the greatest battle to be honest. Killah...ur just makin obvious shit...you need to try and think of something fresh. The simple metaphor won't cut it. Street...your basically just usin good vocab for the sake of usin it...
"Im estimatin that at an approximation"
^your sayin the same shit...pointless multies...you could of added sumthin else in there.
But overall...der was only one line that actually wasn't a "no..." in this entire battle and that was posted by Street. So he gets my vote.
/v- Street Legend
Givin ya'll some real feedback. Take it any way you like, just tryin to help. Return the favour with honest votes plz.
http://community.rapbattles.com/showthread.php?t=135899
http://community.rapbattles.com/showthread.php?t=135882
pz out. God Bless.
- T-West.