ok....this was fairly goood.
it was a good read,i enjoyed it which is a big plus point
think ur imagery was good.it was a nice concept..sum gud rhymes
try to up ur vocab,it jus makes it look beta.
return the fav by dropping an honest vote on this topical battle plz
(make sure u gve a decent explanation)
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=138223