Look down on busy streets form my balcony, thinking about life
Trying to go cold turkey but I miss the toxins more then my wife

I need the drugs to ease the pain of my childhood, beaten as a boy
My step dad hated me,, he invaded our lives like the horse at Troy

Fuck him anyway I’m going to be a real man and finish what he started
I’m going to end this fucked up life,,,, sorry but that bastards retarded

I have nightmares of the repeated beatings,,, waking up in hot sweats
Slitting my wrists twice in a year, I’m destined to die with no regreats

He touched me,,.. invaded me in ways a father shouldn’t touch a son
I feel dirty, Can never love, Can never trust, Born to death like a gun

My emotions are Damaged, Mentally Tarnished, Physically Punished
I see no end, my life’s been a joke since it started, I wish I just vanished


I’m doing this tonight,, my plight can’t be resolved,,, so I see no end in sight
Turn out the light, thinking of ways to end my fight, hanging myself out of spite

I cheated on my wife, she tried to love me, in the end hates me, I have sinned
I’m back on the balcony contemplating a jump,, teary eyed due to the wind

I hate you all!! Nobody really cared this is my mothers only fear
Her only son dieing before her,,.. But to be honest I don’t care

Knife pulled from my pocket, slit both my wrists and my Achilles tendons
Blood pouring out my body, drained of life holding my holly pendent

Had to take my last look at the world before I become an entity
Empty of life, body functions starting to fail, now I got eternity

Feeling cold,,, my heart beat is starting to fade,,,, it’s time to depart
My life flashing before my eyes, But to me it’s just about to start