This was decent, a good concept and the emotion was presented well... There were some powerful lines in here and it was strong in belief, thats what caught my eye the most... Saw some multies involved, lacced internal rhymes but the rhythm stayed on point mos of the time... The wordplay lacced, but I know thats not where you were coming from, some metaphors woulda been nice in this though... Vocab again was lacced, but you delivered the message that you were trying to say... At the end it was simplistic, aint a bad verse though, keep spitting and elevating, im feeling the concept...

Peez...