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Light Weight
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IP:
I was feeling the subject matter and you had some real depth and emotion in your words, but stylistically it was pretty basic and the flow was only ok. Keep it up though, I realize this is only a rough draft so the final piece should be dope. 6/10.
P.S. If you got time return the favour and check out "Fulcrum Shift" by me. Peace
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People take my word even when I sound kind of absurd
But one senses nonsense when my two cents get heard
Rhythms
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