decent piece, nice drop. its a little rough, but i felt where you were coming from. your new anyway...so it doesnt matter.

advice...
work on your structure
proofread everything
separate verse(s) from hooks
work on the flow (your verse(s) rhythm)

what i liked...
your emotion
your vocab
you painted a pretty good picture...cool

keep working on your craft and continue elevating. you can only get better.

s.v....a.k.a...father crhyme.......c.s.

__________________

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick Fletcher. I don't drive an Eclipse, they're chickmobiles.

QUESTION: Is it even possible to improve upon perfection???
ANSWER: CRHYME SINDICATE



"I remember this one time I thought I was wrong........but I was mistaken." -Unknown




R.I.P. Jonathan "ONE MAN BAND/TERUMOTO" Nigro. Goodbye brother. God bless the dead. One love.