Voted For: Premanition


How quick it all passes the good times of youth…
Like waiting for that fairy to collect your tooth…
To tell the truth im not sure I made the most of it…
Looking for perfect times unaware I was so close 2 it…
just gone like wind, carrying you like winter leaves…
Trying to be your idol, punching like keanu reeves…
Missin school but at the time like manic depression…
Yet leaving made u panic cos of fear of progression…
Scared of the future and so desperate for the past…
Broken leg on purpose so kids wud sign the cast…
Just wanted it to last but its all gone in a flash…
Selling unwanted gifts on the front for extra cash…
Invest in a cabinet to store prestigious medals in…
Excruciating pain but refuse to take the medicine…
Medalling with friends results in first detention…
Much tension on muscles to grab the girls attention…
Eyes re-open from closure to nothing but memories…
Feels like life not over but been going for centuries…
Gone like the wind in full agreement with the phrase…
Tear dissolves through skin after the content on this page…

good structure n vocab...direction was decent, you stayed on topic pretty good...story line couldve be written better...
but i liked ya metas n vocab...was feelin ya drop a bit more..

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is there a heaven on earth cuz were all living in hell/
lockin ourselves up, we livimg better lives in jail/
president's makin the burbs better,the ghetto he missed/
angels with us in the hood, do they even co-exist/
seeds of prejudice impreganating our motherland/
so we reinforce our color wherever we stand/
takes trajadies for us to come together as one/
our mouths are bleeding spite from biting out tounge/
were all pawns in this chess game of life/
without us our kings woulnt take the strike/
martin king died,freedom left too on the streacher/
he opend the pth wide, thank th lord if he blessed ya/
satins paved in the streets where we all reside/
God protects us but we all keep heat on or side/
the man above risked his everything even his son/
all he asks is for us all to live life in unison/
if its right in your head then blow away the sin/
when we reach the gates, all pain will be gone with the wind/

^^thought you did well for ya first topical, but overall i wasnt feelin some of ya lines.example..all pawns in the chess game of life<<some stuff like that was jus plain not original..
both lacked creativity..both couldve been more directed at the topic...
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overall i gave it to prem cuz of vocab n a lil better direction on the topic....but to both.."where was the emotion".???
you both had no real lines protrayin any...dissapointed....

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i'll play on ya consience, ya contents is complete nonsense
speak of biting, then you fucks flip everyone of my damn concepts
what the fuck, was you high..?
did you think i wouldn't recognize lines that i made
then you come up some bullshit tryna prove that im gay...!
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fake fucks..move on...!