This was LONG ass read but it was nice though. Structure needs some fixing though, could've divided it into paragraphs or seperate poems (feedback will come quicker). The emotion was raw and I was definately feeling what you were trying to say here. Liked the continuous change of pace in your poem, your vocab was good and imagery was tight.It'll be hard to get much feedback on this, maybe you can edit it and make it bit shorter (divide it into several poems). Just a thought...shame to see this getting wasted you know...

DQ

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