yo this was good u kinda kept it simplistic but it caught your attention where u can't stop reading it was all good except for the chorus was kinda a lil off in creativity,

what do i need to proceed, throught this
im hear to re-create a new breed of movements
i can barely breath around tha rudeness
arnt you sappose ta be on tha bottom of tha hip-hop newby list
you probably only sold 2 records back in autom called BOOBIE&NIP'S

after the word rudeness it kinda fell off "hip-hop newby list, it rhymed but didnt go through too smoothly cuz u had 3 syllabales when all the rest had 2 syllabyles, it only fits in when u have a variety of syllabales and the BOOBIE&NIP's is supposed ta be funny???? no hate but it just doesn't make sense at all
anyways the rest of the hook and all your verses defitnly made up for that i'll give ya a 7.5/10 keep elevating