You should indeed drop it in OM but expand the last part bit then.

I LOVED the concept of this poem and how it progressed, with the flashback and everything. Emotion was so pure and strong, really felt what you were saying, very good aspect. Another remarkable thing for me was the scene you managed to portray inside my head. I could really see someone laying there, reminscing of the good old days and such...Just love how you put this all together, found a good balance in your vocab and your structure was good as well. I'm definately feeling this poem and enjoyed reading it! Good going man!

Dopeness...

DQ

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