Originally Posted by Kesse

really good piece, i thought, i knew what you were talking about fromt the get go, but you played it out really nice, good vocab and wordplay made it real enjoyable to read, good flow, structure okay....metas were good, "Her tears swept shores with the force of tsunamis"....loved that line....this was a great piece, althought i had one problem....the way you put the adam and eve story in there, then began talking about theories of evolution and what not...because in the bible, got created the world, and stars and what not., but you mentioned "was this all predicted before"....there was no before.....so, yeah, thought that line was contradictory, but the rest was good....keep up