Okay, lemme break this one down...

The concept might not be too original but it's always nice to read some love stuff instead of all these disses.

The beginning was cool, I like the tattoo-line, the rest was quite basic stuff but cool for an introduction to the piece.

Then the first part from the girl's perspective was quite basic as far as vocab and emotion/imagery is concerned but it wasn't too bad. We got to know what's going on and how the girl feels about it even though I felt especially the emotion could be better, I missed the sense of sadness, sense of being lost and helpless...

Guy's perspective was better in my opinion, found a good balance with the vocab. I also felt the emotion was stronger in the last part, sense of being betrayed, of relief maybe. I liked the Akon-line a lot but overall, I think the last part was the best of the entire piece.

Curious about part 2 to see how the story continues...

DQ

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