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IP:
Hm.. this was pretty good , alittle short for me..
but it was cool... you had lots of feeling , nice emotions..
Good imagery... your wordplay was there...could have been alittle better..
vocab was good... structure was alittle shaky.. overall it was a nice drop..
pretty nice topic, i felt you could have worked alittle more on feeling , and emotion
maybe if you made it alittle longer it would have cought the readers attention alittle more ...maybe made the topic stand out more , but overall nice drop..keep it up
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The Competition
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